Cherry B Cherry Wine: Just A Teen-Girl Proto-Alcopop? Product Review.

In my quest to inform the general public about what they should be spending their hard-earned discretionary moolah upon, from time to time I chance upon the odd alcoholic substance and decide to do a little research. Purely in a spirit of generous and noble research, I’m sure you understand. Yeah, you do.

My latest foray into the bibulous world of alcoholic beverages has been with the cheeky little cherry wine known and sold as ‘Cherry B’. This vinous product is packaged in much the same way as shandy and weak or exotic beer in four-packs of small green bottles. Per bottle you get a very scant wineglass (one hundred and thirteen millilitres) full of dark-red vino, smelling rather strongly of cough medicine and jam, and tasting that way too. It doesn’t really taste much of cherries as such, though it doesn’t taste like regular wine made from grapes either.

At eleven point five per cent proof, it’s about the same strength as most regular wines or approximately so, and counts as one point three UK units per bottle. Is it a drink you should be embarrassed to be seen drinking out? It certainly has that ‘trainer bra’ or ‘training wheels’ vibe about it. Mentally I associate it with snowballs and Babycham; kids’ stuff your auntie pours you at Christmas when you’re not old enough for a proper drink but just about old enough to be indulged a bit. (Is that just my family?)

Can I recommend the stuff? Well, I think it depends what you want it for and what mood you’re in. I might buy it again now and then as the whim strikes me, though my favourite tipple is always going to be regular vino (or maybe gin and orange, when in the mood.) But if you're feeling nostalgic for adolescence and that outlaw vibe of illicit boozing, then they'll probably do the trick. Plus, if you're in just the right mood, they do taste pretty good. Another plus: any mention of cherry wine makes me and many other elderly folks immediately think of the lyrics to Jermaine Stewart's immortal 'We Don't Have To Take Our Clothes Off'. 'And drink some cherry wine, uh-huh.' What do you mean, that's not a bonus?